At my place of work, the summer months are when the work gets heavy. Most people would tighten up in this situation, but I loosen up if anything. I don’t know, I guess the fact that most of my posts are nightly postings show that I am a bit of a night owl. The office is not open at night, thus most of my work gets done at home, at night. Honestly, I just show up at the office for meetings. My personal space at the office is infested with cobwebs I bet.
I will not say what I do for a living, but I will tell you that the office atmosphere is a bitch. That is why, in the summer months when tensions are higher, I like to humor myself (and sometimes others) with office pranks. Here are a few of my personal favorites:
- Fill a male co-worker’s stapler with effeminate pink staples without him knowing
- Collect coupons for embarrassing health care products and then decorate a co-worker’s cubicle with them while they are out
- Leave out of order signs on: copier, restroom door, co-worker’s computer, meeting room door, water cooler, chairs, office entrance
- Draw on parking lot with sidewalk chalk (might have to get to office early, lots of potential)
Some I do not recommend, but I have done in the past:
- A coworker who goes out for Chinese food every day comes back with horrible smelling breath. One day after he went out, I dumped 400 fortune cookies in his cubicle. Where did I get 400 fortune cookies? You’d be surprised how easy and cheap they are to get. I was.
- I got to the office really early. A custodian let me in and helped me move the table and chairs out of the meeting room. I brought in a TV and a couple of bean bag chairs. When people arrived, they questioned it at first, and then they just assumed it was okay. The boss came in and threw a fit once he caught half a dozen people in there watching Price is Right, all while I watched on the sidelines. My most successful and gratifying prank ever.
- I once let a couple of rats loose in the office. I told my supervisor they were pets and I accidentally brought them in with me, in what was an Oscar-worthy performance of the concerned pet-owner. The entire office was engaged in a game of cat and mouse. We spent the entire day and only found one of them. At least that’s what they thought. I had actually secretly taken one of them back. They still think there is a rat scurrying around.
Why would I choose to tell you all of this while probably sacrificing my job? I am quitting that damn place tomorrow and starting somewhere new on Friday. Figured I’d let someone in on my genius.
